Wiping the Slate Clean

Recently, at a funeral, I stood looking around whilst waiting for the minister to start the internment service. I was struck by the fact that every gravestone that I could see covered the grave of an apparent paragon of virtue. In serried ranks of black, white and grey, they marched as far as the eye could see, and each stating that the deceased was a greatly-missed saint. Rank after rank of devoted spouses and wonderful parents, grandparents, children and friends. Not a rotter or swine. None unkind, mean or bad.
Of course, this is utter nonsense. The interred were human beings just like you and I. Some good, some evil and the vast majority just floating in the middle. So, what caused those who arranged the funerals to view them with rose-tinted spectacles?
Any of you who come from a background of the large working-class families of early last century might have a clue. On my mother’s side, my grandfather was one of nine and my grandmother one of thirteen. As a child, I remember that there were always feuds going on. The sight of one group of great aunts putting on hats and coats and marching out when another group arrived was more par for the course than unusual. The times of neutrality were weddings but particularly funerals. Then in hushed tones the deceased, who the week before they were not talking to, was described in glowing terms. As the cups of tea or, according to taste, glasses of stout, emptied, the noise would increase as more and more favourable anecdotes were told. It was more than not speaking ill of the dead. It might possible have been a desire to be treated the same when their turn came. However, I suspect that the main reason was the belief that death wiped all slates clean.
I believe that idea is simply not true. The evil men do can last for generations after them. If slates are to be wiped clean, then it must start during people’s lifetimes.
Throughout his ministry, Christ was constantly criticized for the company that he kept. The lowly uneducated working class, tax collectors and prostitutes. He accepted any background. He saw what his critics did not. That within each one was the capacity for good and ability to grow as a human being. By showing each of them love and trust, he brought out the best in them. Not everyone will react like that but most will do so. By example, he changed their lives and those same people went on to found a church that continues as a force for good 2,000 years later.
So, if you want to write the truth on any future gravestone, then start loving those people now. Show them loving kindness, understanding, care and consideration and see how well most will respond. They in turn will interact with others and goodness and love will spread. Then it may be possible, in many generations’ time. To stand in a cemetery and genuinely be surrounded by the remains of true saints.